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Post by formerlyme on Jul 10, 2021 15:46:51 GMT -5
This is short and sweet. You, too, can be beat. I've slipped in to say that I am last today!
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Post by jaila on Jul 10, 2021 19:45:49 GMT -5
Well, that truly is sweet and is short! I feel I should enter a retort! WHile you've slipped yourself in, You did make me grin, But I'll leave you all aghast, when I MYSELF, am obviously last!
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Post by 2old on Jul 11, 2021 7:15:54 GMT -5
Oh, my! It's hard to believe The crowds jumping in, attempting to deceive. Suggesting they could win by being last Even though they know die is cast!
Your taunts are welcome as the year goes by. Accolades coming your way for giving it a try. Just so you know, when this year comes to an end 2old will be last to post so don't be disappointed, my friend!!!!
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Post by formerlyme on Jul 16, 2021 19:15:09 GMT -5
MY TURN AGAIN!
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Post by Weezer on Jul 16, 2021 20:41:32 GMT -5
and now its Weezers turn to accept the Urn the urn of the Last To Post , and i ain't no Ghost!! Just came here to boast from coast to coast, been long time since i been here last.. but now am back.. to perform my 1st to be Last!! Now don't be looking so aghast ! I'll be quick and i will be fast! yep ,,, again im the first to be last!!!
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Post by 2old on Jul 17, 2021 6:22:00 GMT -5
Watching The Open Championship on our tv Due to a tournament today, no golf for me. That's okay, for it'll take me all day to catch up with these games. The ladies have been active, though I'm not naming names!
Can't render a story and keep my mind on the golf at the same time. It's barely all I can do to post in prose and in rhyme. But, I'll be back in the near future with a tall tale unlike any in the past. For now, though... as always... it's 2old who is first to post last!!!!
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Post by Weezer on Jul 17, 2021 14:50:39 GMT -5
Well hubby is also a golfing freak he watches tv Gulf week to week! for me i do not mind watching it.. But golfing is not a game i would pick pulling an old bag with some sticks inside all puffed up and full of pride. i would rather be the one who cheers or moans. While sitting on my rocking chair as i watch the man shoot that ball in the air!.. when it lands in the water pond.. then its time for me to give hubby a wink as he sits there looking so depressed.. who would of ever guessed , the best shot ever was put to rest. well time for me to say adios and tootles. time for me to make some noodles . yes Spegetti is almost done ,so now that i have had some fun, but now seems its time to run. but first i have something to say im the last to post , So listen to me yelling, hip, hip , hooray!!
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Post by jaila on Jul 18, 2021 9:37:00 GMT -5
There's some sneaky posters, here for sure! I thought I'd stop by, and leave one more! Now, if the TV would only play more golf in December, it might make it a bit easier, for us all to remember; WHo will and who will not, be around for the end of the year. And who will, and who will not, be shedding a tear..... When I myself, win, and from ear to ear grin, Or if not, I might choose to switch hobbies, and doodle and doodle, and would you take pity then, and please, give me some of those noodles?
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Post by 2old on Jul 18, 2021 11:47:33 GMT -5
As y'all know, I play golf most every single day. We see some interesting things on the course that we play. This morning was no different, adding to the odd things that we've seen. We saw a little girl walking up the fairway on hole number fifteen.
From the tree line to the left of the second cut of rough A bear charged the girl, hairy and looking really gruff. From her bag the girl grabbed an iron, I think it was the five. Now, a 5-iron against a bear? This little blondie would not survive.
The charging bear stopped in his tracks as if the 5-iron was a gun. We couldn't believe our eyes when the girl smiled as if this was fun. Our group stood there in shock, no shelter for the girl or us to seek. All of a sudden, we heard this little girl in a steady voice begin to speak.
"Papa Bear, my name is Goldilocks and I know when you live So I wouldn't advise you any trouble me or any golfers here to give. Touch one hair on my head and you will regret I swear to you. You have no idea the revenge I can rain down on your family and you!"
"I will spit in your porridge, followed by arsenic or ptomaine. You'll be rolling on the floor, whimpering in severe stomach pain! I will dump thousands of fleas in each one of your beds. I'll lower all the doorways so you crack you thick skulls and heads!"
"I'll sneak in while you're hibernating and shave off all your hair Then watch as you freeze to death, standing in a corner of your lair. So, make up your mind if you really want to tangle with this blonde Or get out of my way so I can play this game of which I'm so fond!"
Letting out a stifled whine, with all four of his paws on the ground. As if he was on a leash, 180 degrees the bear spun around. Off into the trees the bear ran, no longer appearing very mean. Goldilocks, without hesitation, knocked her ball up on the green.
It took quite a few minutes for my heart to quit racing in my chest. I just really wanted a place to sit and take a little rest. But, I kept on playing wanting to finish the rounds very fast So I could type out this rhyme and be, as always, the first to post last!!!!
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Post by Weezer on Jul 18, 2021 19:03:42 GMT -5
Bravo, brave. dear 20ld .. a man made of gold! i also was holding my breath , just wondering how you could make this story without making my heart pounding like a drum so quick!
til Goldilocks came up with a Porridge made with arsenic, oh my! Guessing that will be the last of that bear trying to avoid a hit on the head with her iron made of lead!
anywho i enjoy the story and will be back tomorrow .for another good tale from our favorite Riddler of which i can boast!!
well time to go .,.I will be back because i know someone will be last before i go to bed tonight so look for weezer, yep she will be here and Everywhere!! last to post so i have nothing to fear!!
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Post by 2old on Jul 19, 2021 12:19:00 GMT -5
Going places so dog and I are headed for the car As we start our journey we aren't going very far. Seat belt is buckled to hold the dog in place. If we hit something she may get the airbag in her face!
Gotta have her protected, wouldn't want the dog to be hurt. If she fell to some harm, with my wife, my name would be "Dirt"! She's only 15 pounds so I fear the seatbelt might not hold her in. Soon, though, this journey around the block must begin.
She's standing on her hind legs, looking through the windshield. After the last time we tried this, my cuts and bruises have finally healed. Her paws are on the steering wheel, her tail is swinging to and fro. I can tell by her toothy smile, this dog is ready to go!
I have every confidence from this journey we will return alive As I reach over and easily shift this car into 'Drive'. Oh, no!!! I feel the car moving and it's already out of control! Will we crash head-on into something or will the car begin to roll??!!
The dogs paws have ended up on one side of the steering wheel! The car is trying to 180 as the g-force I begin to feel! A truck is looming large ahead and we're going way too fast. Don't know if I'll survive this, but for now it's 2old who is posting last!!! :>)
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Post by Weezer on Jul 19, 2021 17:30:59 GMT -5
Today i have to say is almost like any other day.. so not much to say , only hope this rain will go away!!! the heavy rain we got today actually knocked off our peaches to the ground and that made me frown. but they are still young so brought them inside hoping they will ripen and survive.. They say the rain in Spain , lies mainly on the plain here it hits the ground so hard . it actually made dents in our yard ! Luckily we live on top of a hill so at least we will not drown , we have a narrow creek that sits next to the highway, but never floods the street. anywho, i just came by to say Hi to everyone including that special guy you know who he is.. a funny and talented man he is.. an almost professional Golfer ! Although he denies he is. but we love to hear his golfing tales He could actually publish his own gift of Golf which we all love to hear and to laugh and cough.. well best be going home but want you all to know,,, weezer was here and is the last to post!!!
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Post by 2old on Jul 19, 2021 18:01:56 GMT -5
Don't be aghast For just that fast 2old is first to be last!!!!!!
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Post by Weezer on Jul 21, 2021 21:09:46 GMT -5
Short and Sweet Looks real neat Lets all meet at the end of street December thirty first! Pop open the Champagne then my Trophy i can Claim!!
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Post by 2old on Jul 22, 2021 17:35:10 GMT -5
Decided not to go to the golf course today. Instead, I needed to help baling some hay. Riding the wagon behind the baler, stacking bale by bale Hoping that with the hay hook, my leg I would not impale.
Triple digit temperatures... My goodness, the heat was unbearable. It took about an hour, but... finally... the hay wagon was full. Off to the barn to store the bales for winter cattle feed For when snow covers the ground, the cows their hay they will need.
Riding on the load of bales, the old John Deere pulling us toward the farm When all of a sudden, a terrific pain shot through my arm!!! I looked down and a Diamondback Rattlesnake had his fangs embedded, venom flowing free. When I realized what was happening, fear took charge and began to overcome me.
I grabbed the rattler with my good arm and bit the rattles right off his tail! Spitting the rattles over the wagon side, into the road ditch I watched them sail. I shoved the snake's fangs right back into the marks he had left on my arm. Ain't gonna let a scary old snake do me any harm!!!
With his fangs back in my arm, a deep breath I did take Stuck the tail in my mouth and sucked the venom right back into the snake! The snake's head began to expand, swelling up like an old toad Filling with my blood and his venom, I just knew the head would explode!
Grabbing the tail I ripped that snake's fangs right outta my arm Wanting to make sure this slithering creature did no more harm. I'd been a champion, in my younger days, at cracking a bull whip. There was no way I would let this snake go, as I tightened my grip.
With all the speed I could muster, I whipped this snake and then I heard a snap. The snake's head disengaged from his body, flying far as if leaving the map! At the hospital the nurses didn't know whether or not to believe my story Until I showed them the headless/tailless snake, even though it was a little gory.
Now I understand you, too, may have some doubts about the story I have told. If you don't believe me I'll make an offer that is extremely bold Come see the snake mounted on the wall in my shop Realizing the goal I have to be posting last will never, ever stop!!!!
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