Post by 2old on Jan 31, 2022 7:36:34 GMT -5
Well, we sorta think it's good.
Wife's brother spent 20 years in the Army. During his career, he married and they had two boys. His wife had been married before and had a daughter by the first marriage. BIL adopted the daughter.
Young... military... deployments... His wife found a 'new love' and they divorced. BIL was single a couple years and remarried. His second wife... trying to find acceptable words as adjectives... was not a nice/decent/considerate/sane person!!
She prevented him from ever seeing his boys. He went 30 years without seeing them, leading to significant resentment by them to their dad. She, for the 30 years they were married, was very controlling, accusing, and would not allow him out of her sight. They lived out in Nevada for a number of years and moved back to this area about 10 years ago. She would not talk to my wife. She would not talk to his brother who also lives in this area. Even accused him of having an affair with my wife... his sister. Evil lady... and he put up with it. The adopted daughter by his first marriage passed early with cancer. Wife would not allow him to go to the funeral.
(I keep using the term "allow". Of course, he could have done what was right and what he wanted. From what we saw and what we were told, she was an angry and threatening person. He just went along with her demands.)
Early last year, she passed away. She had been a hypochondriac. Probably had more than a dozen surgeries over the last couple years of her life. If one doctor would tell her nothing was wrong, she would "doctor shop" until someone would do surgery.
Soon after she passed, he made contact with his boys. One has been in the Marines for 22 years and is stationed in Missouri. The other is an EMT in Louisiana. The boys came up here and we had a fantastic "reunion". My wife and I had driven and visited both boys and their families about 2 years ago. We had met their families and my wife had kept in contact with both boys' wives.
The first wife has just completed 9 months of chemo for breast cancer. At this time, cancer free. She had been living with the son in Louisiana. BIL went down to visit the son and his family. He and his first wife each, evidently, saw what they had allowed to be destroyed so many years ago. In the past couple of months since they reunited, it's been interesting. They have made a number of trips back and forth between here and Louisiana. They've spent time with my wife and her other brother. She is a breath of fresh air, compared to the "evil" lady.
This week, they announced they will be getting married. They are both 71 years old!!!!! We're happy for them. We're happy for their boys. For those boys to have spent the years not knowing their dad and harboring feelings of abandonment, to see their parents happy... holding hands like teenage lovebirds... spending time with grandkids... is sorta like a television romantic comedy.
To be able to put your mistakes behind you, no matter how many years it takes, and try to make amends seems like a feel good story.
Wife's brother spent 20 years in the Army. During his career, he married and they had two boys. His wife had been married before and had a daughter by the first marriage. BIL adopted the daughter.
Young... military... deployments... His wife found a 'new love' and they divorced. BIL was single a couple years and remarried. His second wife... trying to find acceptable words as adjectives... was not a nice/decent/considerate/sane person!!
She prevented him from ever seeing his boys. He went 30 years without seeing them, leading to significant resentment by them to their dad. She, for the 30 years they were married, was very controlling, accusing, and would not allow him out of her sight. They lived out in Nevada for a number of years and moved back to this area about 10 years ago. She would not talk to my wife. She would not talk to his brother who also lives in this area. Even accused him of having an affair with my wife... his sister. Evil lady... and he put up with it. The adopted daughter by his first marriage passed early with cancer. Wife would not allow him to go to the funeral.
(I keep using the term "allow". Of course, he could have done what was right and what he wanted. From what we saw and what we were told, she was an angry and threatening person. He just went along with her demands.)
Early last year, she passed away. She had been a hypochondriac. Probably had more than a dozen surgeries over the last couple years of her life. If one doctor would tell her nothing was wrong, she would "doctor shop" until someone would do surgery.
Soon after she passed, he made contact with his boys. One has been in the Marines for 22 years and is stationed in Missouri. The other is an EMT in Louisiana. The boys came up here and we had a fantastic "reunion". My wife and I had driven and visited both boys and their families about 2 years ago. We had met their families and my wife had kept in contact with both boys' wives.
The first wife has just completed 9 months of chemo for breast cancer. At this time, cancer free. She had been living with the son in Louisiana. BIL went down to visit the son and his family. He and his first wife each, evidently, saw what they had allowed to be destroyed so many years ago. In the past couple of months since they reunited, it's been interesting. They have made a number of trips back and forth between here and Louisiana. They've spent time with my wife and her other brother. She is a breath of fresh air, compared to the "evil" lady.
This week, they announced they will be getting married. They are both 71 years old!!!!! We're happy for them. We're happy for their boys. For those boys to have spent the years not knowing their dad and harboring feelings of abandonment, to see their parents happy... holding hands like teenage lovebirds... spending time with grandkids... is sorta like a television romantic comedy.
To be able to put your mistakes behind you, no matter how many years it takes, and try to make amends seems like a feel good story.