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Post by 2old on Dec 21, 2018 18:40:18 GMT -5
It was a dark and stormy night when suddenly she appeared. wearing the mud-coated wedding dress.
She entered the venue and to her surprise, not a soul was there.
The lights were on, the tables were set and yet not one detail was out of place to indicate or explain the reason for the emptiness that she had walked into.
Suddenly, she heard the door slam shut and lock. She screamed upon realizing that she was not really alone. Then the lights went out.
She was trembling with fear and needed a place to hide but couldn't find her way in the dark.
From out of nowhere a hand suddenly reached out, smearing her face with wedding cake and icing.
It was a skeletal hand, and she recoiled in horror.
The hauntingly quiet room was suddenly shaken by hysterical laughter from the blonde dressed in a wedding gown, "I never knew a Halloween party in December could be so much fun!" as the knife slipped between her ribs.
She had a look of horror on her face as she slowing fell to the floor, noticing who was standing behind her.
Trying to scream, her terror was enhanced as she realized the assailant was strangling her with the wedding gown train.
Peering to her left, she realized, her 5" stiletto heel laying on the floor next to her and managed to grab a hold of it.
As she wrapped her ever-weakening fingers around the shoe, hoping her remaining strength was sufficient, a shot rang out.
The shot found its target in her right hand and a male voice yelled, "What happened to my bride?"
To which the 'bride' replied, "Well, dear, we may have taken the foreplay a little too far this time so get me a bandage for my hand and let's get on with properly celebrating our 10th wedding anniversary!"
...."and while you're at it send this wedding dress with the mud, blood and gore to the cleaners."
She went off, to another room, to clean herself up and changed into a sexy red dress.
She opened her armoire to reveal the several dozen red dresses she owned and knew that choosing just one wasn’t going to be an easy task given her time constraint of only a few minutes in which to return to the party downstairs where she could hear the muffled sounds of the Phantom of the Opera soundtrack beginning to play.
As she was slithering into the red dress, her cell phone chimed immediately sending her into uncontrollable fits of laughter.
It was a producer from the Jerry Springer show.
She rolled her eyes, brushed her hair from her face and looking again at the name on the phone, had thoughts of how insane her Anniversary celebration had become, before throwing the phone in the toilet.
The next door neighbor, curvy blonde who was supposed to play a part in the spicy anniversary celebration, entered the restroom... sat on the toilet... just as the lithium phone battery erupted in flames.
Holy Mackerel! Who catered tonight's buffet? The toilet just exploded! Was it the chicken wings?
A porcelain chip from the exploding toilet, propelled by the exploding battery, rocketed through the air and pierced the heart of the husband leaving the bride and the blonde staring into space with blank looks... a pose not that uncommon to a blonde female.
Suddenly, the blonde snapped out of her blank stare and asked if the toilet still worked because she had to do a ‘number one’.
With a broken toilet, a husband impaled by pieces of a toilet, and a blonde bimbo running around looking for a place to empty her bladder the bride screamed, "Put a cork in it or use the kitchen wastebasket and help me find the keys to the safety deposit box!"
"....because we need to escape before the cops arrive and we need money, lots of money."
The bride said, "my husband is in charge of money and keys and he is bleeding from the heart! Somebody call 911. I threw my phone in the toilet after Jerry Springer's call."
Immediately after she said that, she had now realized that perhaps she should have taken the call from the Springer show producer because she had heard that the show pays big bucks to the right participants providing they have no qualms about getting down and dirty in front of an audience of millions.
No money, husband bleeding out on the floor, desperation setting in, the bride suddenly has an idea that could result in her... and only her... escaping from this chaos.
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Post by TheSource on Dec 23, 2018 22:43:32 GMT -5
It was a dark and stormy night when suddenly she appeared. wearing the mud-coated wedding dress.
She entered the venue and to her surprise, not a soul was there.
The lights were on, the tables were set and yet not one detail was out of place to indicate or explain the reason for the emptiness that she had walked into.
Suddenly, she heard the door slam shut and lock. She screamed upon realizing that she was not really alone. Then the lights went out.
She was trembling with fear and needed a place to hide but couldn't find her way in the dark.
From out of nowhere a hand suddenly reached out, smearing her face with wedding cake and icing.
It was a skeletal hand, and she recoiled in horror.
The hauntingly quiet room was suddenly shaken by hysterical laughter from the blonde dressed in a wedding gown, "I never knew a Halloween party in December could be so much fun!" as the knife slipped between her ribs.
She had a look of horror on her face as she slowing fell to the floor, noticing who was standing behind her.
Trying to scream, her terror was enhanced as she realized the assailant was strangling her with the wedding gown train.
Peering to her left, she realized, her 5" stiletto heel laying on the floor next to her and managed to grab a hold of it.
As she wrapped her ever-weakening fingers around the shoe, hoping her remaining strength was sufficient, a shot rang out.
The shot found its target in her right hand and a male voice yelled, "What happened to my bride?"
To which the 'bride' replied, "Well, dear, we may have taken the foreplay a little too far this time so get me a bandage for my hand and let's get on with properly celebrating our 10th wedding anniversary!"
...."and while you're at it send this wedding dress with the mud, blood and gore to the cleaners."
She went off, to another room, to clean herself up and changed into a sexy red dress.
She opened her armoire to reveal the several dozen red dresses she owned and knew that choosing just one wasn’t going to be an easy task given her time constraint of only a few minutes in which to return to the party downstairs where she could hear the muffled sounds of the Phantom of the Opera soundtrack beginning to play.
As she was slithering into the red dress, her cell phone chimed immediately sending her into uncontrollable fits of laughter.
It was a producer from the Jerry Springer show.
She rolled her eyes, brushed her hair from her face and looking again at the name on the phone, had thoughts of how insane her Anniversary celebration had become, before throwing the phone in the toilet.
The next door neighbor, curvy blonde who was supposed to play a part in the spicy anniversary celebration, entered the restroom... sat on the toilet... just as the lithium phone battery erupted in flames.
Holy Mackerel! Who catered tonight's buffet? The toilet just exploded! Was it the chicken wings?
A porcelain chip from the exploding toilet, propelled by the exploding battery, rocketed through the air and pierced the heart of the husband leaving the bride and the blonde staring into space with blank looks... a pose not that uncommon to a blonde female.
Suddenly, the blonde snapped out of her blank stare and asked if the toilet still worked because she had to do a ‘number one’.
With a broken toilet, a husband impaled by pieces of a toilet, and a blonde bimbo running around looking for a place to empty her bladder the bride screamed, "Put a cork in it or use the kitchen wastebasket and help me find the keys to the safety deposit box!"
"....because we need to escape before the cops arrive and we need money, lots of money."
The bride said, "my husband is in charge of money and keys and he is bleeding from the heart! Somebody call 911. I threw my phone in the toilet after Jerry Springer's call."
Immediately after she said that, she had now realized that perhaps she should have taken the call from the Springer show producer because she had heard that the show pays big bucks to the right participants providing they have no qualms about getting down and dirty in front of an audience of millions.
No money, husband bleeding out on the floor, desperation setting in, the bride suddenly has an idea that could result in her... and only her... escaping from this chaos.
She stood upright, closed her eyes, clicked her heels together three times and said “There’s no place like home.”
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Post by 2old on Dec 24, 2018 8:09:51 GMT -5
It was a dark and stormy night when suddenly she appeared. wearing the mud-coated wedding dress.
She entered the venue and to her surprise, not a soul was there.
The lights were on, the tables were set and yet not one detail was out of place to indicate or explain the reason for the emptiness that she had walked into.
Suddenly, she heard the door slam shut and lock. She screamed upon realizing that she was not really alone. Then the lights went out.
She was trembling with fear and needed a place to hide but couldn't find her way in the dark.
From out of nowhere a hand suddenly reached out, smearing her face with wedding cake and icing.
It was a skeletal hand, and she recoiled in horror.
The hauntingly quiet room was suddenly shaken by hysterical laughter from the blonde dressed in a wedding gown, "I never knew a Halloween party in December could be so much fun!" as the knife slipped between her ribs.
She had a look of horror on her face as she slowing fell to the floor, noticing who was standing behind her.
Trying to scream, her terror was enhanced as she realized the assailant was strangling her with the wedding gown train.
Peering to her left, she realized, her 5" stiletto heel laying on the floor next to her and managed to grab a hold of it.
As she wrapped her ever-weakening fingers around the shoe, hoping her remaining strength was sufficient, a shot rang out.
The shot found its target in her right hand and a male voice yelled, "What happened to my bride?"
To which the 'bride' replied, "Well, dear, we may have taken the foreplay a little too far this time so get me a bandage for my hand and let's get on with properly celebrating our 10th wedding anniversary!"
...."and while you're at it send this wedding dress with the mud, blood and gore to the cleaners."
She went off, to another room, to clean herself up and changed into a sexy red dress.
She opened her armoire to reveal the several dozen red dresses she owned and knew that choosing just one wasn’t going to be an easy task given her time constraint of only a few minutes in which to return to the party downstairs where she could hear the muffled sounds of the Phantom of the Opera soundtrack beginning to play.
As she was slithering into the red dress, her cell phone chimed immediately sending her into uncontrollable fits of laughter.
It was a producer from the Jerry Springer show.
She rolled her eyes, brushed her hair from her face and looking again at the name on the phone, had thoughts of how insane her Anniversary celebration had become, before throwing the phone in the toilet.
The next door neighbor, curvy blonde who was supposed to play a part in the spicy anniversary celebration, entered the restroom... sat on the toilet... just as the lithium phone battery erupted in flames.
Holy Mackerel! Who catered tonight's buffet? The toilet just exploded! Was it the chicken wings?
A porcelain chip from the exploding toilet, propelled by the exploding battery, rocketed through the air and pierced the heart of the husband leaving the bride and the blonde staring into space with blank looks... a pose not that uncommon to a blonde female.
Suddenly, the blonde snapped out of her blank stare and asked if the toilet still worked because she had to do a ‘number one’.
With a broken toilet, a husband impaled by pieces of a toilet, and a blonde bimbo running around looking for a place to empty her bladder the bride screamed, "Put a cork in it or use the kitchen wastebasket and help me find the keys to the safety deposit box!"
"....because we need to escape before the cops arrive and we need money, lots of money."
The bride said, "my husband is in charge of money and keys and he is bleeding from the heart! Somebody call 911. I threw my phone in the toilet after Jerry Springer's call."
Immediately after she said that, she had now realized that perhaps she should have taken the call from the Springer show producer because she had heard that the show pays big bucks to the right participants providing they have no qualms about getting down and dirty in front of an audience of millions.
No money, husband bleeding out on the floor, desperation setting in, the bride suddenly has an idea that could result in her... and only her... escaping from this chaos.
She stood upright, closed her eyes, clicked her heels together three times and said “There’s no place like home.”
Dazed, but alive, the bride attempted to clear her mind enough to make some decisions when she heard the wail of sirens quickly approaching.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Dec 24, 2018 11:47:36 GMT -5
It was a dark and stormy night when suddenly she appeared. wearing the mud-coated wedding dress.
She entered the venue and to her surprise, not a soul was there.
The lights were on, the tables were set and yet not one detail was out of place to indicate or explain the reason for the emptiness that she had walked into.
Suddenly, she heard the door slam shut and lock. She screamed upon realizing that she was not really alone. Then the lights went out.
She was trembling with fear and needed a place to hide but couldn't find her way in the dark.
From out of nowhere a hand suddenly reached out, smearing her face with wedding cake and icing.
It was a skeletal hand, and she recoiled in horror.
The hauntingly quiet room was suddenly shaken by hysterical laughter from the blonde dressed in a wedding gown, "I never knew a Halloween party in December could be so much fun!" as the knife slipped between her ribs.
She had a look of horror on her face as she slowing fell to the floor, noticing who was standing behind her.
Trying to scream, her terror was enhanced as she realized the assailant was strangling her with the wedding gown train.
Peering to her left, she realized, her 5" stiletto heel laying on the floor next to her and managed to grab a hold of it.
As she wrapped her ever-weakening fingers around the shoe, hoping her remaining strength was sufficient, a shot rang out.
The shot found its target in her right hand and a male voice yelled, "What happened to my bride?"
To which the 'bride' replied, "Well, dear, we may have taken the foreplay a little too far this time so get me a bandage for my hand and let's get on with properly celebrating our 10th wedding anniversary!"
...."and while you're at it send this wedding dress with the mud, blood and gore to the cleaners."
She went off, to another room, to clean herself up and changed into a sexy red dress.
She opened her armoire to reveal the several dozen red dresses she owned and knew that choosing just one wasn’t going to be an easy task given her time constraint of only a few minutes in which to return to the party downstairs where she could hear the muffled sounds of the Phantom of the Opera soundtrack beginning to play.
As she was slithering into the red dress, her cell phone chimed immediately sending her into uncontrollable fits of laughter.
It was a producer from the Jerry Springer show.
She rolled her eyes, brushed her hair from her face and looking again at the name on the phone, had thoughts of how insane her Anniversary celebration had become, before throwing the phone in the toilet.
The next door neighbor, curvy blonde who was supposed to play a part in the spicy anniversary celebration, entered the restroom... sat on the toilet... just as the lithium phone battery erupted in flames.
Holy Mackerel! Who catered tonight's buffet? The toilet just exploded! Was it the chicken wings?
A porcelain chip from the exploding toilet, propelled by the exploding battery, rocketed through the air and pierced the heart of the husband leaving the bride and the blonde staring into space with blank looks... a pose not that uncommon to a blonde female.
Suddenly, the blonde snapped out of her blank stare and asked if the toilet still worked because she had to do a ‘number one’.
With a broken toilet, a husband impaled by pieces of a toilet, and a blonde bimbo running around looking for a place to empty her bladder the bride screamed, "Put a cork in it or use the kitchen wastebasket and help me find the keys to the safety deposit box!"
"....because we need to escape before the cops arrive and we need money, lots of money."
The bride said, "my husband is in charge of money and keys and he is bleeding from the heart! Somebody call 911. I threw my phone in the toilet after Jerry Springer's call."
Immediately after she said that, she had now realized that perhaps she should have taken the call from the Springer show producer because she had heard that the show pays big bucks to the right participants providing they have no qualms about getting down and dirty in front of an audience of millions.
No money, husband bleeding out on the floor, desperation setting in, the bride suddenly has an idea that could result in her... and only her... escaping from this chaos.
She stood upright, closed her eyes, clicked her heels together three times and said “There’s no place like home.”
Dazed, but alive, the bride attempted to clear her mind enough to make some decisions when she heard the wail of sirens quickly approaching.
Just as two fire trucks pulled up she realized the building was on fire. She said, "OMG! I left my cigarette burning on the bathroom sink. It must have fallen in the waste basket."
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Post by butterfly on Dec 24, 2018 12:15:59 GMT -5
It was a dark and stormy night when suddenly she appeared. wearing the mud-coated wedding dress.
She entered the venue and to her surprise, not a soul was there.
The lights were on, the tables were set and yet not one detail was out of place to indicate or explain the reason for the emptiness that she had walked into.
Suddenly, she heard the door slam shut and lock. She screamed upon realizing that she was not really alone. Then the lights went out.
She was trembling with fear and needed a place to hide but couldn't find her way in the dark.
From out of nowhere a hand suddenly reached out, smearing her face with wedding cake and icing.
It was a skeletal hand, and she recoiled in horror.
The hauntingly quiet room was suddenly shaken by hysterical laughter from the blonde dressed in a wedding gown, "I never knew a Halloween party in December could be so much fun!" as the knife slipped between her ribs.
She had a look of horror on her face as she slowing fell to the floor, noticing who was standing behind her.
Trying to scream, her terror was enhanced as she realized the assailant was strangling her with the wedding gown train.
Peering to her left, she realized, her 5" stiletto heel laying on the floor next to her and managed to grab a hold of it.
As she wrapped her ever-weakening fingers around the shoe, hoping her remaining strength was sufficient, a shot rang out.
The shot found its target in her right hand and a male voice yelled, "What happened to my bride?"
To which the 'bride' replied, "Well, dear, we may have taken the foreplay a little too far this time so get me a bandage for my hand and let's get on with properly celebrating our 10th wedding anniversary!"
...."and while you're at it send this wedding dress with the mud, blood and gore to the cleaners."
She went off, to another room, to clean herself up and changed into a sexy red dress.
She opened her armoire to reveal the several dozen red dresses she owned and knew that choosing just one wasn’t going to be an easy task given her time constraint of only a few minutes in which to return to the party downstairs where she could hear the muffled sounds of the Phantom of the Opera soundtrack beginning to play.
As she was slithering into the red dress, her cell phone chimed immediately sending her into uncontrollable fits of laughter.
It was a producer from the Jerry Springer show.
She rolled her eyes, brushed her hair from her face and looking again at the name on the phone, had thoughts of how insane her Anniversary celebration had become, before throwing the phone in the toilet.
The next door neighbor, curvy blonde who was supposed to play a part in the spicy anniversary celebration, entered the restroom... sat on the toilet... just as the lithium phone battery erupted in flames.
Holy Mackerel! Who catered tonight's buffet? The toilet just exploded! Was it the chicken wings?
A porcelain chip from the exploding toilet, propelled by the exploding battery, rocketed through the air and pierced the heart of the husband leaving the bride and the blonde staring into space with blank looks... a pose not that uncommon to a blonde female.
Suddenly, the blonde snapped out of her blank stare and asked if the toilet still worked because she had to do a ‘number one’.
With a broken toilet, a husband impaled by pieces of a toilet, and a blonde bimbo running around looking for a place to empty her bladder the bride screamed, "Put a cork in it or use the kitchen wastebasket and help me find the keys to the safety deposit box!"
"....because we need to escape before the cops arrive and we need money, lots of money."
The bride said, "my husband is in charge of money and keys and he is bleeding from the heart! Somebody call 911. I threw my phone in the toilet after Jerry Springer's call."
Immediately after she said that, she had now realized that perhaps she should have taken the call from the Springer show producer because she had heard that the show pays big bucks to the right participants providing they have no qualms about getting down and dirty in front of an audience of millions.
No money, husband bleeding out on the floor, desperation setting in, the bride suddenly has an idea that could result in her... and only her... escaping from this chaos.
She stood upright, closed her eyes, clicked her heels together three times and said “There’s no place like home.”
Dazed, but alive, the bride attempted to clear her mind enough to make some decisions when she heard the wail of sirens quickly approaching.
Just as two fire trucks pulled up she realized the building was on fire. She said, "OMG! I left my cigarette burning on the bathroom sink. It must have fallen in the waste basket."
As the fire burned on, the husband slowly arose from the floor, yanked the porcelain shard from his chest and said, "I think I'm going to enjoy being one of the undead!"
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Post by formerlyme on Dec 24, 2018 14:36:14 GMT -5
It was a dark and stormy night when suddenly she appeared. wearing the mud-coated wedding dress.
She entered the venue and to her surprise, not a soul was there.
The lights were on, the tables were set and yet not one detail was out of place to indicate or explain the reason for the emptiness that she had walked into.
Suddenly, she heard the door slam shut and lock. She screamed upon realizing that she was not really alone. Then the lights went out.
She was trembling with fear and needed a place to hide but couldn't find her way in the dark.
From out of nowhere a hand suddenly reached out, smearing her face with wedding cake and icing.
It was a skeletal hand, and she recoiled in horror.
The hauntingly quiet room was suddenly shaken by hysterical laughter from the blonde dressed in a wedding gown, "I never knew a Halloween party in December could be so much fun!" as the knife slipped between her ribs.
She had a look of horror on her face as she slowing fell to the floor, noticing who was standing behind her.
Trying to scream, her terror was enhanced as she realized the assailant was strangling her with the wedding gown train.
Peering to her left, she realized, her 5" stiletto heel laying on the floor next to her and managed to grab a hold of it.
As she wrapped her ever-weakening fingers around the shoe, hoping her remaining strength was sufficient, a shot rang out.
The shot found its target in her right hand and a male voice yelled, "What happened to my bride?"
To which the 'bride' replied, "Well, dear, we may have taken the foreplay a little too far this time so get me a bandage for my hand and let's get on with properly celebrating our 10th wedding anniversary!"
...."and while you're at it send this wedding dress with the mud, blood and gore to the cleaners."
She went off, to another room, to clean herself up and changed into a sexy red dress.
She opened her armoire to reveal the several dozen red dresses she owned and knew that choosing just one wasn’t going to be an easy task given her time constraint of only a few minutes in which to return to the party downstairs where she could hear the muffled sounds of the Phantom of the Opera soundtrack beginning to play.
As she was slithering into the red dress, her cell phone chimed immediately sending her into uncontrollable fits of laughter.
It was a producer from the Jerry Springer show.
She rolled her eyes, brushed her hair from her face and looking again at the name on the phone, had thoughts of how insane her Anniversary celebration had become, before throwing the phone in the toilet.
The next door neighbor, curvy blonde who was supposed to play a part in the spicy anniversary celebration, entered the restroom... sat on the toilet... just as the lithium phone battery erupted in flames.
Holy Mackerel! Who catered tonight's buffet? The toilet just exploded! Was it the chicken wings?
A porcelain chip from the exploding toilet, propelled by the exploding battery, rocketed through the air and pierced the heart of the husband leaving the bride and the blonde staring into space with blank looks... a pose not that uncommon to a blonde female.
Suddenly, the blonde snapped out of her blank stare and asked if the toilet still worked because she had to do a ‘number one’.
With a broken toilet, a husband impaled by pieces of a toilet, and a blonde bimbo running around looking for a place to empty her bladder the bride screamed, "Put a cork in it or use the kitchen wastebasket and help me find the keys to the safety deposit box!"
"....because we need to escape before the cops arrive and we need money, lots of money."
The bride said, "my husband is in charge of money and keys and he is bleeding from the heart! Somebody call 911. I threw my phone in the toilet after Jerry Springer's call."
Immediately after she said that, she had now realized that perhaps she should have taken the call from the Springer show producer because she had heard that the show pays big bucks to the right participants providing they have no qualms about getting down and dirty in front of an audience of millions.
No money, husband bleeding out on the floor, desperation setting in, the bride suddenly has an idea that could result in her... and only her... escaping from this chaos.
She stood upright, closed her eyes, clicked her heels together three times and said “There’s no place like home.”
Dazed, but alive, the bride attempted to clear her mind enough to make some decisions when she heard the wail of sirens quickly approaching.
Just as two fire trucks pulled up she realized the building was on fire. She said, "OMG! I left my cigarette burning on the bathroom sink. It must have fallen in the waste basket."
As the fire burned on, the husband slowly arose from the floor, yanked the porcelain shard from his chest and said, "I think I'm going to enjoy being one of the undead!" He quickly realized that he would have to kill his wife, so that the pair of them could be happily undead together, forever.
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Post by TheSource on Dec 25, 2018 17:32:36 GMT -5
CHAPTER 1 It was a dark and stormy night when suddenly she appeared. wearing the mud-coated wedding dress.
She entered the venue and to her surprise, not a soul was there.
The lights were on, the tables were set and yet not one detail was out of place to indicate or explain the reason for the emptiness that she had walked into.
Suddenly, she heard the door slam shut and lock. She screamed upon realizing that she was not really alone. Then the lights went out.
She was trembling with fear and needed a place to hide but couldn't find her way in the dark.
From out of nowhere a hand suddenly reached out, smearing her face with wedding cake and icing.
It was a skeletal hand, and she recoiled in horror.
The hauntingly quiet room was suddenly shaken by hysterical laughter from the blonde dressed in a wedding gown, "I never knew a Halloween party in December could be so much fun!" as the knife slipped between her ribs.
She had a look of horror on her face as she slowing fell to the floor, noticing who was standing behind her.
Trying to scream, her terror was enhanced as she realized the assailant was strangling her with the wedding gown train.
Peering to her left, she realized, her 5" stiletto heel laying on the floor next to her and managed to grab a hold of it.
As she wrapped her ever-weakening fingers around the shoe, hoping her remaining strength was sufficient, a shot rang out.
The shot found its target in her right hand and a male voice yelled, "What happened to my bride?"
To which the 'bride' replied, "Well, dear, we may have taken the foreplay a little too far this time so get me a bandage for my hand and let's get on with properly celebrating our 10th wedding anniversary!"
...."and while you're at it send this wedding dress with the mud, blood and gore to the cleaners."
She went off, to another room, to clean herself up and changed into a sexy red dress.
She opened her armoire to reveal the several dozen red dresses she owned and knew that choosing just one wasn’t going to be an easy task given her time constraint of only a few minutes in which to return to the party downstairs where she could hear the muffled sounds of the Phantom of the Opera soundtrack beginning to play.
As she was slithering into the red dress, her cell phone chimed immediately sending her into uncontrollable fits of laughter.
It was a producer from the Jerry Springer show.
She rolled her eyes, brushed her hair from her face and looking again at the name on the phone, had thoughts of how insane her Anniversary celebration had become, before throwing the phone in the toilet.
The next door neighbor, curvy blonde who was supposed to play a part in the spicy anniversary celebration, entered the restroom... sat on the toilet... just as the lithium phone battery erupted in flames.
Holy Mackerel! Who catered tonight's buffet? The toilet just exploded! Was it the chicken wings?
A porcelain chip from the exploding toilet, propelled by the exploding battery, rocketed through the air and pierced the heart of the husband leaving the bride and the blonde staring into space with blank looks... a pose not that uncommon to a blonde female.
Suddenly, the blonde snapped out of her blank stare and asked if the toilet still worked because she had to do a ‘number one’.
With a broken toilet, a husband impaled by pieces of a toilet, and a blonde bimbo running around looking for a place to empty her bladder the bride screamed, "Put a cork in it or use the kitchen wastebasket and help me find the keys to the safety deposit box!"
"....because we need to escape before the cops arrive and we need money, lots of money."
The bride said, "my husband is in charge of money and keys and he is bleeding from the heart! Somebody call 911. I threw my phone in the toilet after Jerry Springer's call."
Immediately after she said that, she had now realized that perhaps she should have taken the call from the Springer show producer because she had heard that the show pays big bucks to the right participants providing they have no qualms about getting down and dirty in front of an audience of millions.
No money, husband bleeding out on the floor, desperation setting in, the bride suddenly has an idea that could result in her... and only her... escaping from this chaos.
She stood upright, closed her eyes, clicked her heels together three times and said “There’s no place like home.”
Dazed, but alive, the bride attempted to clear her mind enough to make some decisions when she heard the wail of sirens quickly approaching.
Just as two fire trucks pulled up she realized the building was on fire. She said, "OMG! I left my cigarette burning on the bathroom sink. It must have fallen in the waste basket."
As the fire burned on, the husband slowly arose from the floor, yanked the porcelain shard from his chest and said, "I think I'm going to enjoy being one of the undead!" He quickly realized that he would have to kill his wife, so that the pair of them could be happily undead together, forever.
Barbara awoke with a start, she heard the kids in the kitchen, and realized she had just experienced a really bad dream.
CHAPTER 2
At the breakfast table, Barbara was trying to recall the events she had in her dream to try and make sense of it all and why she had the nightmare in the first place since she had been on “the medication”.
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Post by 2old on Dec 26, 2018 8:39:32 GMT -5
CHAPTER 2
At the breakfast table, Barbara was trying to recall the events she had in her dream to try and make sense of it all and why she had the nightmare in the first place since she had been on “the medication”.
Over and over in her mind, she replayed the warnings from television commercials encouraging people to use the medicine her specialist had prescribed.
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Dec 26, 2018 11:39:10 GMT -5
CHAPTER 2
At the breakfast table, Barbara was trying to recall the events she had in her dream to try and make sense of it all and why she had the nightmare in the first place since she had been on “the medication”.
Over and over in her mind, she replayed the warnings from television commercials encouraging people to use the medicine her specialist had prescribed.
Or, perhaps it was the reality show she had watched on Netflix before falling asleep, called "Cheapskate Weddings."
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Post by Kady on Dec 26, 2018 12:14:41 GMT -5
CHAPTER 2
At the breakfast table, Barbara was trying to recall the events she had in her dream to try and make sense of it all and why she had the nightmare in the first place since she had been on “the medication”.
Over and over in her mind, she replayed the warnings from television commercials encouraging people to use the medicine her specialist had prescribed.
Or, perhaps it was the reality show she had watched on Netflix before falling asleep, called "Cheapskate Weddings."
......or maybe the potato salad was bad she had for dinner.
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Post by 2old on Dec 26, 2018 13:18:56 GMT -5
CHAPTER 2
At the breakfast table, Barbara was trying to recall the events she had in her dream to try and make sense of it all and why she had the nightmare in the first place since she had been on “the medication”.
Over and over in her mind, she replayed the warnings from television commercials encouraging people to use the medicine her specialist had prescribed.
Or, perhaps it was the reality show she had watched on Netflix before falling asleep, called "Cheapskate Weddings."
......or maybe the potato salad was bad she had for dinner.
Regardless, it was time to head off to work as she was already anticipating a difficult day at the office due to the firm having suffered such a devastating financial loss.
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Post by Deleted on Dec 26, 2018 13:46:15 GMT -5
CHAPTER 2
At the breakfast table, Barbara was trying to recall the events she had in her dream to try and make sense of it all and why she had the nightmare in the first place since she had been on “the medication”.
Over and over in her mind, she replayed the warnings from television commercials encouraging people to use the medicine her specialist had prescribed.
Or, perhaps it was the reality show she had watched on Netflix before falling asleep, called "Cheapskate Weddings."
......or maybe the potato salad was bad she had for dinner.
Regardless, it was time to head off to work as she was already anticipating a difficult day at the office due to the firm having suffered such a devastating financial loss.
It seems the company that employed Barbara owned a convention center that had burned down the night before. The fire inspector knew it had been started by a careless smoker.
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Post by TheSource on Dec 26, 2018 15:58:09 GMT -5
At the breakfast table, Barbara was trying to recall the events she had in her dream to try and make sense of it all and why she had the nightmare in the first place since she had been on “the medication”.
Over and over in her mind, she replayed the warnings from television commercials encouraging people to use the medicine her specialist had prescribed.
Or, perhaps it was the reality show she had watched on Netflix before falling asleep, called "Cheapskate Weddings."
......or maybe the potato salad was bad she had for dinner.
Regardless, it was time to head off to work as she was already anticipating a difficult day at the office due to the firm having suffered such a devastating financial loss.
It seems the company that employed Barbara owned a convention center that had burned down the night before. The fire inspector knew it had been started by a careless smoker.
Realigning her thoughts to concentrate on driving, she pulled up in front of her local Starbucks to get her usual latte on the way to work and as she was about to turn the car off, a breaking news announcement came blaring out of the radio speakers.
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Post by Kady on Dec 26, 2018 16:27:58 GMT -5
At the breakfast table, Barbara was trying to recall the events she had in her dream to try and make sense of it all and why she had the nightmare in the first place since she had been on “the medication”.
Over and over in her mind, she replayed the warnings from television commercials encouraging people to use the medicine her specialist had prescribed.
Or, perhaps it was the reality show she had watched on Netflix before falling asleep, called "Cheapskate Weddings."
......or maybe the potato salad was bad she had for dinner.
Regardless, it was time to head off to work as she was already anticipating a difficult day at the office due to the firm having suffered such a devastating financial loss.
It seems the company that employed Barbara owned a convention center that had burned down the night before. The fire inspector knew it had been started by a careless smoker.
Realigning her thoughts to concentrate on driving, she pulled up in front of her local Starbucks to get her usual latte on the way to work and as she was about to turn the car off, a breaking news announcement came blaring out of the radio speakers.
It was the FBI, seems the careless smoker was a.......Russian spy, that had entered the country at El Paso Texas...
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Post by 2old on Dec 26, 2018 16:46:59 GMT -5
CHAPTER 2:
At the breakfast table, Barbara was trying to recall the events she had in her dream to try and make sense of it all and why she had the nightmare in the first place since she had been on “the medication”.
Over and over in her mind, she replayed the warnings from television commercials encouraging people to use the medicine her specialist had prescribed.
Or, perhaps it was the reality show she had watched on Netflix before falling asleep, called "Cheapskate Weddings."
......or maybe the potato salad was bad she had for dinner.
Regardless, it was time to head off to work as she was already anticipating a difficult day at the office due to the firm having suffered such a devastating financial loss.
It seems the company that employed Barbara owned a convention center that had burned down the night before. The fire inspector knew it had been started by a careless smoker.
Realigning her thoughts to concentrate on driving, she pulled up in front of her local Starbucks to get her usual latte on the way to work and as she was about to turn the car off, a breaking news announcement came blaring out of the radio speakers.
It was the FBI, seems the careless smoker was a.......Russian spy, that had entered the country at El Paso Texas...
Her mind was racing, knowing her firm's biggest competitor is located in El Paso and may well have planted a spy under the guise as an illegal immigrant.
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